Arjun Rampal And Mehr Jessia Part Ways, Here's How You Can Deal With A Divorce The Healthy Way

Separations can be tough; spending years together and then parting ways with the person who was your one and only is not easy. Few couples have it in them to start in a positive spirit and end it the same way. Actor Arjun Rampal and Mehr Jessia recently announced their separation through a joint statement to a leading daily. The couple had been married for two decades, had two daughters Mahikaa and Myra and have now mutually decided to part ways with each other.

Their statement read, "After a 20-year-long beautiful journey filled with love and beautiful memories, we would like to share, that all journeys have different paths. We feel that it is time for us to move on to different destinations henceforth. We have always been solid when it has come to us, we will continue to be solid for each other and our loved ones, as we embark upon a new journey. Both of us being extremely private people feel strange to be making this statement, but such are the circumstances of our lives. Where the truth can get distorted and lost. We are a family, our love for each other is forever intact and we shall always be there for one another and most importantly, for our children Mahikaa and Myra. We would therefore appreciate our privacy through this time. Thank all for their support. Relationships can end, but love lives on. We won't be commenting on this any further."

Also read: Here's How Parental Conflicts Can Affect Children

Rumours about Arjun Rampal and Mehr getting divorced had been around for a long time now, soon after they were spotted together outside Bandra court. The actor however dismissed all the rumours with one tweet.

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Nevertheless, divorce can be debilitating for both the couple and the children. It is only by knowing how to handle it in a healthy and sporty spirit do couples get past this phase. For this, we spoke to psychologist Dr Prerna Kohli as to how two people can have a positive and healthy attitude towards a divorce. She said, "It is important for the individual to accept that their marriage has ended and moved on. It is important to forgive your ex-spouse, as it allows you to heal yourself."

Also read: Going Through A Divorce? 7 Tips To Help Your Children Cope With It

Dr Kohli explains the importance of knowing how to maintain a healthy relationship even after you have parted ways. She says, "While you may distance yourself from your ex-spouse, it is mandatory to maintain a civil and healthy relationship with your ex-spouse for the sake of your children. These simple rules will help: firstly lead by example, don't say negative things about your ex to your children. Secondly, instead of focusing your energy on your ex-spouse or the circumstances of the divorce, which will lead to a negative energy, focus this energy on yourself, on improving yourself, learn a new skill, make new friends, socialize more, this will create a positive energy. Thirdly demonstrate kindness, let your children observe you being the loving, caring kind human being that you are, you, your children and your ex-spouse are still a family if not the traditional family."

Also read: Tips To Help Children And Their Parents Deal With Divorce And Separation

No matter how much you wanted the divorce or how well you deal with it, it can still be quite debilitating for your kids. Dr Kohli believes that post-divorce, it is important to first heal yourself and then protect and heal your children. She says, "Just as the instructions in the airplane is that in case of a drop in oxygen first wear the oxygen mask yourself before assisting others, similarly in a divorce you first need to enable yourself and then only will you be strong enough to enable and help your children. Simply said your children should view you as a strong, individual even post the divorce who is capable of looking after yourself, ready to face the future as a single parent when they view you as such they too learn to accept the new dynamics of the family." 

(Dr Prerna Kohli is a clinical psychologist)