My husband and parents ignore me, what should I do?
Q: My husband is a nice guy and has never physically or mentally abused me. But he has no interest in me. He only likes books and his drink. His parents and sister don't like me at all and always find some fault with me to complain about it to him. After that he starts fighting and ignoring me more. He does not take me out anywhere. I try the best to keep him humoured, but to no avail. Recently my parents also have started to find fault with all that I do and do not even speak to me. They say I have told something about them to my older sister, which I haven't. I leave my child there and come to office. Earlier when I called from work to find out about my child, they would answer me, but nowadays they just give curt replies. My child does not sleep well at night and I have to get up early to prepare breakfast, lunch and dinner. I have no help from anyone. I can't afford to have a full time maid. I never complain, but even if I mention that I am tired, I get to hear that I am not the only working mother. I have put on too much of weight, but the timing of the gym does not suit my working time. Please help.
A:Compatibility is a two-way term. Fortunately people of different personalities can too be compatible. It is all about looking at commonalities and appreciating and respecting the differences. One’s personality trait should not be taken/ perceived as disinterest / criticality. Life is all about persistence, perseverance, and doing the right thing. Relationships improve with time, effort, understanding, compromise, looking at the other person’s perspective etc. Some individuals do get depressed because of inability to cope with life’s ups and downs. But nothing is permanent- neither the down nor the up. Hope is the only single important thread, which makes one keep on going. However, if you feel sad most of the time, have inability to enjoy your day top day activities, start having low energy levels, feel tired most of the time, start feeling hopeless, helpless, or have low self esteem ideation, it may be prudent to take help from a psychiatrist. Relationship counselling is also something, which you may want to consider along with the other coping methods.