Will leaving my job help in coping with my family problems?
Q: My 64 years old mother-in-law is a clinical patient and is undergoing treatment for the same for the last 6 years. This year she is troubling a lot. She gets excited and aggressive sometimes. Whenever the doctor gives her strong medicines she feels dizzy and weak but she doesn’t stop murmuring or there is no improvement in her thoughts. We as a family are husband, wife, daughter who is now 14 years old and mother-in-law. My daughter has become stubborn and does what she likes. I am working in a corporate office and my husband is an accountant. My husband is now asking me to leave my job to take care of my mother-in-law and daughter. We are not financially sound. If I leave my job it will be difficult for us to cope up with the house expenses and loan, hence my husband is saying that we will sell the flat and stay on rent so that there is no burden of any loan. My daughter is now in 9th class so her studies have become a priority. Have tried explaining to her that studies and career are important but she isn't taking anything seriously. Please help me take a decision as I am in two minds, whether to leave a secure job or to continue in the same circumstances. My mother in law is showing no sign of improvement and her doctor is asking us to be patient and keeps giving her medicine but she tries to run out of the house or does something risky as keeping the gas stove on or keeping the water taps open or even puts on the geyser. What decision should I take to cope with this situation? Can leaving my job help? Will my daughter get worse due to my mother in law’s problem? Both of them don't get along at all and keep fighting. Please suggest.
A:Sorry to learn about your troubles, you have just said your mother in law is a clinical patient that does not give much information about her sickness. But from the description you have given and your difficulties, may I suggest following: 1) Have you considered having a full time help at home to look after your mother in law? 2) Quitting the job, may stress you more, as it is not easy to be full time house maker and looking after a teenage daughter and sick mother in law. Work may be giving you a window to breath. So consider this before making a big decision. 3) First take few weeks leave and try looking after home etc,and see how you manage it. 4) Has your husband considered helping at home, or is it just your responsibility? 5) Have you considered Family therapy?