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What can I do about my husband who is addicted to girls?

Q: I got married three years ago. From the first day of marriage I am not happy because my husband had had an affair for 3 years before our marriage. Just a few months before our marriage, his girlfriend’s family had opposed their marriage but he is still in love with her. She too got married last year. I mailed her about our relationship and asked her not to stay in touch but she said that my husband only keeps messaging her. One thing I am quite happy is that she does not reply back to him. But there is another problem – my husband is not close to me. He does not share things with me like his joys and sorrows. Also, he wanted a baby soon, so we have a 5 months old daughter. He is short tempered and doesn't take care of her also. He likes to stay in touch with many of his girl friends through mail and chats and sends them sex jokes. I saw his mail by mistake once but was too scared to question him. He has a new girlfriend who is married and he spends time chatting with her, sending her dirty jokes. I am very confused. What do I do? I don't want to live but seeing my baby I have no choice. I have told him that I don't like him speaking with girls but he says he is like this only, and he often gets upset and doesn't talk to me or goes to the other room and locks himself up and gets engaged with the computer. Please advise me a way out.

A:If you do not intervene or take help from somebody (family/friends) these kinds of situations/relationship problems may get worse. It is possible that your husband might suffer from certain psychiatric disorders or it is possible that it's a disorder in his personality. In either case, I suggest you confront him and give him the message that this kind of behaviour is not acceptable. If you feel it is difficult for you to confront him alone, you need to involve someone that you can rely on (family/friends). Don't let this continue - it will worsen with time.


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