My boyfriend got drunk and kissed a girl, what should I do?
Q: I met a guy on the Internet a year back. Both of us are doing our masters in USA. We are in different places and I haven't met him yet. I have just seen him in pictures and through the webcam while chatting. We have maintained a lively relationship through phone. We have become very close in the past 5-6 months, that we even had plans to get married after we get a job. But a few days back, he got drunk and became physically close to a girl. He says, he didn't remember anything until another friend told him about it the next day. He says that he is still a virgin and that he had only kissed that girl several times. I love this guy, but I don't know what to do now. I am confused, as he has left an open choice for me to walk out on him if I am uncomfortable. I felt terrible when he told me about this incident. But I am not able to leave him completely. Many questions are going through my head, like how would he face that girl again? He says that he made a mistake. I am losing my courage. How should I handle this situation?
A:You could definitely spend more time considering the marriage option, especially since you might need more time to know him better. You can also appreciate the fact that he was honest with you and told you himself. At the same time, you need to consider that you may be committing to someone who is not taking appropriate responsibility for his action and may also do something similar in the future. Is such a person ready for a serious commitment? Overall you need to consider whether this behaviour is usual or has it occurred only once and is it a genuine mistake, which will never occur again? The intensity of your feelings for him will take time to reduce; don't expect to suddenly stop caring. Similarly regaining trust will also take time.