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I am unable to get along with my wife, what do I do?

Q: I am recently married and unable to get closer to my wife as I had a love affair in the past but no sex. I am still in touch with her and like her very much. It was a arranged marriage and I don't have any interest in my wife. I am a friendly guy and I move very easily with people but I am finding it very difficult to even talk to my wife. I know what I am doing is wrong but can't help it. The problem is that I am now neither here nor there, and the level of depression in me increases day by day thinking that I have lost my entire life and I am very depressed. I think you can understand my position and help me.

A:I understand that this must be really hard for you. But what you must remember that is that all new relationships take some time to develop. As you have mentioned, yours was an arranged marriage. You need to give your wife and yourself a little more time to reach a level of comfort. If the sexual part of the relationship seems difficult, please put that aside for some time. Focus your energies on spending time together doing things that both of you enjoy. Talk to each other and get to know each others thoughts and feelings. If a healthy relationship develops, the sexual component will follow. Reduce the pressure on yourself and enjoy the moment. Things will hopefully work out well. Take care.

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