How should I react to my partner's moves after marriage?
Q: I am 24 years old girl and my parents are looking for a match for me. I am a bit overweight and the thought that comes to my mind is that guys only looking for a good figured girl. Is sex the only thing that comes in their mind when they think about marriage? I never have had a boy friend and people in today’s age are too fast. I sometimes feel will I be able to react the way he will expect me to like when he wants to kiss me or will I have a feeling of rejection?
A:There can be no generalisations that can be made on these issues and it depends highly on the level of maturity of the person in question. However, marriage involves a lot more than physical intimacy. Among other things, it also requires an equality relationship, understanding, compromises and for both individuals to have an intellectual connection. You should play an active role in choosing someone that you have to spend the rest of your life with. It should be a mutual decision. Spend time to get to know the person and only commit after you are comfortable with sharing your fears and thoughts with him. Try to understand yourself better and focus on the things that you feel are attractive about you. A high self-esteem and self confidence can be attractive qualities.