Q: I am a civil engineer, working as a highway consultant. In the office, under aggressive circumstances, when I have to dominate the show, often I turn baffled and blank, missing important points and allowing opponents to get opportunity to win over me and misinterpret me to the people who will take decision about right or wrong. But even if I have strong points, I fail to present them in time in a systematic manner to convince people at the helm of affairs. This inefficiency leads to a lot of mental agony, indecisiveness and tells on my self confidence. Is it a mental problem? Kindly advise me.

A:What you say as inefficiency, has got more to do with some basic personal skills, and some right effort could help you change. For one, you need to be assertive, that means to put your point of view correctly, and openly without hesitation, and in case of opposition, to present your side without any emotional overtures like anxiety or aggression. Secondly, what you mention as misunderstanding could be more about communication skills, and for that learn to rehearse, plan clearly maybe in writing the exact agenda for the meeting in advance, prepare a layout, and follow it. And finally, don't let some issues effect your total self esteem and confidence, no one is perfect, and to be successful one has to maximise his virtues, and try and change some limitations, but always feel good about oneself.