Q: My friend is in depression and has a guilt feeling for an attempt to sexually abuse a 10-year-old girl when he was 13 years old. He is having difficulty concentrating on his job, and has also visited a psychiatrist for help who has advised that this is normal at that age and can happen to any one so he should forget it. I am very close to him and want to help him come out of it, as I know that he is very sincere and an honest man. He is now 29 years old and according to him he had similar depression when he was 23 years old regarding this event. Please help.

A:The first question to as is: Was this man sexually abused before he was 13? When investigating a child who sexually abuses another child, it is common to discover that the abuser was previously a victim himself. When this is explored it can help relieve the guilt being experienced. A more general approach; what was the sexual history of the boy of 13 before he was 13? Another approach: What role did the 10-year-old girl play? This mans guilt issues can only be worked out with the help of a counselor who has experience working with sexual abusers and victims. It takes time, patience, and experience. If there is a group available - of people who have sexual abuse histories- that can be helpful, under the guidance of an experienced sex abuse therapist.