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How can I convince my parents that I don't want to have children right now?

Q: I am a professional working in UK. Both me and my husband have good jobs and are doing very well. We are married for 7 years now. Initially careers took priority and now both of us do not seem to be interested in having children. We often get remarks from friends but, its the parents that we can't cope with? My mother threatens that she is getting depressed and ill because of me not having children. I am very sure that I don't want any children and so is my husband. I am getting upset by the emotional blackmailing from my parents and in-laws. I am the only child of my parents and I completely understand that they want a grandchild, but I can't have a child just because they want one. I should also feel like having one myself. Most of our friends have children but I never ever get broody.

A:I think you are right in not having children without really wanting them. In this situation you must put your and your husband's desires ahead of your respective parents. You may have to sit down with each set of parents separately and perhaps explain your point of view, and the folly of having children for them. Be gentle but firm and remind them that you are only 33 and may change your mind someday. But that having kids without wanting them will be bad for everyone involved- particularly the child.


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