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Am I suffering from inferiority complex?

Q: I am a 20 years old boy. I was an excellent student during my school days but because of my desire to join the Indian Army, I couldn't join any college. I passed the NDA exam several times but failed in the interviews. After my class 12th, I started doing B.Sc (Maths) through distance education. Now, I feel that I am nowhere. I haven't joined the Indian Army though I am trying even now and I‘ve a graduation that can't afford me a decent job. Recently, I decided to join MCA in a regular college so that I could get a good job in the future (and neglect my aspirations to join the Army). But my parents do not agree with this. Sometime back I had written a Banks clerical exam and passed the written exam as well as the interview. I have even received the offer letter. My parents are forcing me to join it. I don't have a choice. Recently I met my class 12th batch mates, they are all placed in good companies and were speaking about their college life. I felt like I missed something really important and I felt that I was in some ways inferior to them. This inferiority complex has made me avoid all the get-togethers. Now, I really don't understand if this act of avoiding is right? Should I join the bank job or should I argue with my parents?

A:At your age these are just the most common conflicts, which unfortunately don't have a readymade answer or solution. Also the answers cannot be just simplistic in yes or no. Each one has to decide based on their individual circumstances. Are their certain responsibilities on you that you have to have fulfil, how good is the financial situation, can you afford to wait, is this the only chance, have you really gone past the age that you cannot apply anymore, the reasoning given by your parents, are there any other concerns in the family, etc, etc. You need to evaluate all these factors and perhaps others best known to you, discuss ( not argue!) with your parents, look at the possibility of doing a job vs. studying while working vs. studying. You are young and I am sure you have the potential to achieve. Have you watched 'Guru' – what does it say – if you have the spirit and the motivation you can achieve. So, I would ask you to sit and evaluate discuss and decide. Lastly take responsibility for any decision you take and do not put the blame on others if it does not work out. All The Best.


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