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How should parents deal with their teenage children?

Q: I want to know what should be the role of parents when a child steps into the teens Is it good to be frank with the child regarding the new atmosphere? I think this is one of the most important subjects of good parenting. I have a very obedient 13 year old daughter who has recently developed a taste for watching MTV, B4U Music, Zee Music, etc. on TV. At the same time she is learning Classical Indian Music and Rabindra Sangeet. She is quite good in her singing classes and has passed her Prathama in first division. But she does not concentrate fully on her studies. Please comment and send your suggestions.

A:I think you are lucky to have a sweet tempered and musical daughter! Enjoy your parenting experience. There is no sudden change, because she is 13 years. old. Development is gradual. There is no harm in her seeing MTV, as long as it does not lead to her rejecting her own culture. In any case, fascination with the global style in clothes, dance and music will be temporary. I don't think that anything has to be told to her about reality, in that sense. But when questions come or the situation arises, you should discuss things with her. Please express your values clearly. Many young people feel that their parents are too vague about things and leave the children to figure out what is right. When you make a rule, explain the reason for the rule. There must be moderation in everything. Do not shout at her if she does something that you do not approve of, but persuade her gently. This takes time, but children will become rebels, if there is a dictator! The most important thing is for the parents to convey affection and concern at all times and to be available for the daughter, when she wants to talk to you or share an experience. She must also respect your right to your values. Even the most intimate relationships as between parents and children should be courteous and considerate. You will be her role models and she would want to be like you, if you are warm. Every family situation is different and children are at different stages of growing up. Let her read stories and novels, so that she gets an idea of the world outside, without having to be personally involved. This will add to her knowledge, when she faces real life situations.


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