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Why is my son using bad words in school?

Q: My 13-year-old son has been using bad words in school off late. In a monthly test held recently, instead of writing the answer to the question, he wrote all bad words related to anal sex. What should I do in such a situation? The principal called me and my wife and threatened to expel the child from school if not suspend him. Please advise.

A:The first thing to do is to talk to your son and ask him why he wishes to use words related to anal sex. If you are open and mature about it, he may not continue his use of such words. You should also explain in a conversation with him, that his sexual organs are growing and related aspects of sexuality are also developing. It is normal for boys at this age, to be thinking of their body, more than ever before. But it is certainly not common to write a test with sexual words! He should also be advised to see a Psychologist or School Counsellor, who will help him to put his bodily impulses in the context of early adolescence. Boys of this age may use bad words (they are not really bad, only presented at the wrong time and context with the intention of shocking grown-ups). At other times, the intention is to show off. They could be used also to express anger or aggression. You and his mother should be concerned about your son's behaviour, but handle it gently and with some humour. It is not something impossible or even difficult to check. Get professional help. Make a request to the school to let him continue there, while you are actively addressing the issues related to the boy's sex education and to the handling of his anger.

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