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Why is my son reluctant to go to school?

Q: My son is 4 years old and studies in senior KG. He is reluctant to go to school. At first we admitted him in a small private school, where he went for 15 days. Later we admitted him to a recognised CBSE affiliated school. After 2-3 days he started saying that that he does not want to go to school. He cries that he doesn't want to write what the teacher says and does not want to participate in extra activities like dancing or prop, for the annual day function. His teacher called me and explained about their school programme. She said that he likes to be in prop and is good at all subjects, but he doesn’t like writing much, due to which she writes remarks in his dairy. One day I overheard him saying to his brother that his teacher wishes children in a gruff voice like gooo...d morning children, and on the second day, she told him that lazy boys don't write, so if you are not a lazy boy you should write fast. It seemed like a taunt to him and he started crying. That is the reason that he doesn't want to go to school. He suffered from adenoids and underwent tonsillitis surgery, for which he took one week's leave. After that he cried severely for three days but is adjusting now. But I feel that something is running in his mind, maybe fear of the teacher, or work. At night when I tell him to keep his books and bag ready so that he won't be late for the bus, he says he doesn't like school. I requested the administrator to change his section, but she says no. Is he behaving like this because we changed his school, or because of the teacher? Should I put him back in his old school?

A:Maybe you should have mentally prepared your child for a few days that he would be going to a new school. He might have found the new school very different from his other one. The child will get used to his teacher. For some children, writing is quite a strain, but schools take no notice of the fact. It is very difficult to teach school systems to be sensitive to a child's needs and abilities and for them to respect individual differences. If you have decided that the present school is the best, just talk to your son and tell him that people are not the same. Some have gruff voices, while others have gentle voices. Read out animal stories to him and use a gruff voice for the part of the lion or the bear. Laugh with him about it and make it your special secret joke that some voices are like that! He will adjust to his school in course of time.

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