Q: My 5 years old daughter is adamant and demanding. She has been showing her tantrums since three years of age. She shouts, punches and acts very rudely. She does that to her brother too. At times she behaves really nice after I ask her to behave properly. I have also observed that she is very confused. For instance, she knows very well the difference between oil and ghee but she always asks me the same thing. Is this normal? How can I discipline her?

A:Quite often, a child's behaviour could be a reflection of some disharmony in the environment.

It seems possible that after the arrival of the second child, a boy, the girl felt neglected. This could mount up gradually. When you say that the child is demanding, do you mean she is demanding of your time?

Is she deliberately says "Ghee" when she mean "oil" she is only playing a game with you. You should check yourself and see that you are becoming humourless and strict. If you just laughed, when she said that, the problem would have been settled.

You should play with the child and have fun with her. There is no need to make her into a perfect being. She needs activities and materials which can engage her and serve as outlets for her energy. You sound like an overtired mother who finds everything a problem. Consult a doctor and see if she prescribes vitamins etc for you. Find out if there are other children her age who can share the playtime with her. Get the help of the child's father also in organizing activities for the children.