Q: My younger son is 4 years old. Due to his health problems, our social gatherings had to stop. He is a shy boy & never use to speak with his play school teacher. Even at home, if we ask him to recite a poem he will only recite it only if we do not keep an eye contact with him. Now he is in nursery. His teacher told us that he is very talkative amongst his friends but when she calls for attendance he doesn't respond. She even punished him by making him stand facing the wall and told him that he can sit only if he says Yes Madam! He started rolling on the floor & cried. He behaves this way at home also, when someone insists him on doing something. Earlier we thought that he is introvert, but his teacher says he is not introvert but adamant. His elder brother is 8 years old and is an extrovert & social child. How can we change his behaviour?

A:Each child is unique, with different ways of doing things and with different levels of self confidence and sociability. Stop comparing your children. Some children are very strong-willed and hate to be under anyones control. When the teacher punished him and humiliated him in front of the whole class, he was upset. The teacher can also develop other ways of taking attendance, but you cannot tell her that. There is no formula for changing behaviour. Persuasion is the best method. A little humour, while dealing with a tricky problem will lead to its solution. We are all too earnest about obedience and good behaviour and too unforgiving of individuality and unconventionality. If your child is shy, do not force him to be outgoing. Let him develop at his own pace.