Q: My daughter is 20 months old. Recently, she has started urinating whenever I scold her or try to reprimand her on wrong behaviour. She's partially toilet trained. Is it because of fear or trying to seek attention? For instance, if she hits me and I tell her its wrong, and I will not speak to her if she does it again, then she urinates. I am very worried and want her to learn the difference between right and wrong.

A:Fear causes children to urinate suddenly. Obviously, you are too tough with her and she is scared of you. She is also fond of you and does not want you to stop talking to her etc. Why do you think it is not right for a child to seek attention? If it were there for the asking, she may not be consciously seeking it. In other words, you will have to attend to her needs more naturally and give her the assurance that you will always be available to her. Instead of worrying about her knowledge of right and wrong, be concerned about her happiness and self-esteem. Losing your temper is bad for you and definitely bad for the child. Why do you have to be so earnest about bringing her up properly? Make a complete change. Be sure that she is happy and her behaviour will take care of itself; learn to enjoy your parenting.