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Why does my daughter cry everyday before going to school?

Q: My daughter is 8 years old. She has developed a habit of crying before going to school every day. Sometimes she also cries in school. She insists that her mother should come and pick her up from school. She also has a habit of repeatedly asking questions, like will you come to pick me after school, will you let me watch TV, etc. She continues to do so even though we assure her that she will get what she wants. However, she does her homework every evening and is a bright student in school. She prefers friends who are older than her. She is stubborn and obstinate. But she has a positive side too. She understands her behaviour in public and her responsibilities towards studies. It's the crying before going to school that is the problem. This problem has persisted since she was in play school.

A:Ask your daughter why she cries and listen carefully to what she says. She does not realise that it has become a habit. Record her crying on a cassette and play it back to her to see how it sounds. Make a joke of it, not to tease her but to make her feel relaxed and to give it up. Suggest that perhaps, she stays back one day to cry, so that she can go freely and happily to school for the rest of the year. You are the best judge of how she will react. What I am suggesting here are only tips on how she can break the habit. But from the questions she keeps asking, it does appear that she feels insecure. Instead of looking only at her achievements or the behaviour, which upsets you, look at her strong points and mention them to her. Tell her that you are proud of her. Hug her and cuddle her once a day at least, and let her be fully assured of your support even if she does not ask.


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