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Why does my child become so aggressive in front of outsiders?

Q: Why does my 5 years old daughter become so indisciplined and aggressive in front of outsiders and behave so well when with us. We were living separately when my daughter was a year old but recently we have shifted to our in-laws house. But now her whole attitude and behaviour has changed. She acts very naughty and moody with her grandparents and throws tantrums but whenever shes alone with me she becomes very well behaved. Why is this so? And, no her grandparents do not pamper her.

A:Children are often not able to express their needs verbally, and may resort to undesirable behaviours to get attention, or to show their reactions. It is possible that she is used to only a few people around her who are in charge of disciplining her, and does not know how to handle the grandparents scolding, and reacts through naughty behaviour. Another reason could be that she gets over-excited in the company of more people, and this excitement is seen as naughty behaviour. You should try to understand the reasons and also ask her directly why she behaves differently in front of others. Once you understand the reasons, you may be able to handle the problem better.

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