Why does my 4-year-old son hide his actual feelings?
Q: My 4 years old only son does not want to play with others toys and he remains calm even if other kids take or snatch away his favourite toys. He is comfortable at home but we can easily see that he becomes uncomfortable when he meets kids who are naughty. Yesterday, a 3-year-old boy kicked my son in his home. My son though getting tears was trying to smile. We do not understand as to why does my son try to hide his real feelings? Please suggest me what to do.
A:Every child has his own temperament and personality. Parents should offer support to the child but not try and change him to some average ideal! The best way to find out about your son is to listen to him. When he is playing with sand, water or clay, he may also talk about things that concern him. You should not pump him for information; rather you should be a good companion letting him talk to you when he feels like it. There are parents who write to me complaining that their child is aggressive. You seem to have the reverse problem. There is nothing to be done. You could encourage your child to defend himself and to protect his personal things. But remember that all children are not alike. Your child seems to be working out his own strategies of dealing with playmates and there is no guarantee that the strategies you suggest would be better.