Q: I have an eight years old daughter. She is unable to cope with her studies and hardly remembers what is taught in the class room. To be specific, these are her problems: 1. Unable to concentrate in studies (sometimes) 2. Does not write fast or complete notes in class room 3. Incomplete notes. 4. Does not remember what is taught in class-room. 5. More interested in talking. (Her grandma talks a lot, do not know if this is hereditary) 6. She is very slow in most of the activities, like eating, dressing, taking bath, brushing and dreams while doing all the above activities including studies. 6. When we punish for her for mistakes, the problems are aggravated. She will loose track of everything. 7. We both are working parents and she stays with her grandmother during the day before we reach home. Is this dyslexia? If yes do we need to give her medicines? Is there any other way to improve her? Will she be Ok when she grows up? Please help us.

A:Your child may not be a case of dyslexia. In any case, there is no medication for it, only help in getting her to read. Being talkative is not known to be an inherited trait, but even if it is, our response to it should not be negative. I think that you need to talk to your daughter and listen to her point of view. Perhaps the class work is difficult for her and she is not able to cope with it. Consult her teachers to find out whether they consider her to be lacking in attention or in ability. When she is dreamy, what is she thinking of? Does she have friends? Does she chat and share jokes and experiences with the parents and the grandmother? Does she mention the teachers? You must think of her as a person, rather than as a school-attending and exam-passing machine! What was she like in her earlier years? Were her milestones of development close to the norm? If she was always slower, you may have to be patient in teaching her and expect her to proceed more slowly. If she was up to the mark until now, then something in her present school must have upset her. You have to make an effort to trace the root of her problem. Perhaps she is merely hoping to have more parental time by requiring more attention for lessons. A number of explanations are possible. I would also advise you not to punish her. The very fear of being punished could be slowing her down. She needs tenderness, affection and consistent rules from you. You cannot leave her with a grandmother and then resent that your daughter imitates her. Step back and take a larger view of your situation and then do what you think is best for the child.