Is my daughter having an emotional upheaval due to us shifting to the US?
Q: We relocated to USA 3 months back with our 6.5 years old daughter. Back in India, both of us used to be very busy so my child was virtually brought up and looked after by my in-laws. She also had a wonderful school back home. After coming here we have chosen a school, which is not exactly the same as the one we like din India. My daughter likes the school very much, but she becomes upset in the evenings and sometimes in the night and hits us, pulls our hair and says that she doesn't want anything in life. When she is with the other kids (mostly Indians staying in our community) she doesn't allow them to leave her and if they do she abuses them. I am worried about her. Will you please guide us on how to take care of this issue?
A:Your daughter seems to be undergoing insecurity and separation anxiety as she was very attached to her grandparents. Added to it is the required adjustment to a different place, culture, people and surroundings. Instead of shock and anger, try to react with firmness and patience. It is important that you spend more time with her and be patient. Encourage the development of attachment and a sense of security. Explain limits of desirable behaviour very firmly. She has to learn that aggression is not allowed. Usually re-adjustment takes place, but some children take longer than others. If the problem persists, consult a child psychologist for assessment and intervention.