How to handle a very talkative child?
Q: I have two children. One daughter aged 9 years is in IVth standard and a son aged 7 years is studying in IInd standard. With the grace of the Almighty, they both are quite good in their studies and are quite attentive, adjusting and compassionate by nature. They are also well mannered. But one problem I have is with my son. It is that he speaks too loudly and too much. Means he continuously talks, talks and talks very loudly. The cause may be is that when he was in nursery, his teacher told him to speak a bit loudly so he has picked it up and now whenever he is speaking, he speaks loudly whether the listener is just around him. This situation creates a problematic scene at times. Kindly help me out how to tackle his problems of speaking loudly and speaking too much. I shall remain ever grateful to you.
A:Your problem does not seem to be very serious. However, you should try and find out why your son talks too loud and too much. Is there anyone in the family that he imitates? Sometimes, children do things to get the attention of their parents or other elders. If you assure him that you will listen even when he talks softly or in a normal way, he may talk like the others in the family. Try making up a game, where everyone in the family will talk in whispers for half an hour. It will be enjoyable for your son to participate in the game and he will begin to see the advantages of talking softly. It will also be an opportunity for you to make sure that his hearing is OK. In cases where there is a hearing problem, children may talk too loud as they are not able to judge how loud or soft they are. This may not be the case with your child, but it is worth checking out. You can also have a game, where everyone in the family will communicate through writing notes to each other. For that period of 20 or 30 minutes, silence should be maintained. The novelty will make the children write better and also provide an alternative to speaking. Plan activities (drawing, painting, music) for your children which they enjoy as they learn and in which they can do well, without a sense of competing with each other. Do not compare the children, but treat them as individuals, with their own tastes and choices. Also try talking to your son directly, when he is relaxed and in a good mood, and tell him that you like it when he does not raise his voice. Also listen to him carefully and respond, so that he gets the confidence of being listened to, even when he is not loud.