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How to discipline a child who doesn't listen to his teacher and parents?

Q: My 4-year-old son is studying in pre-preparatory. His teacher complaints that he does not sit at one place and keeps moving here and there. He pours water into others' tiffin boxes and eats from them too. But he does not eat properly at home and we have to feed him. He is not scared of anyone and does not listen to his teacher. He also has delayed speech though he has started speaking now. He is very stubborn, if he doesn't get what he wants, he starts crying. If we say anything to him, he doesn't listen at all. What should we do?

A:Just as you contacted a Speech Therapist, it is better that you see a Counsellor, School Psychologist or Behaviour Therapist. I can understand your four-year old not being able to sit still for very long. Many children, especially boys find a sitting-down school difficult to adjust to. But pouring water into other children's tiffin boxes is more serious. He is doing it to draw attention to himself, perhaps. But this is just a guess and only a face-to-face consultation would be useful in this case. Try and keep his frustrations down. Don't say NO to everything! If his request is harmless, give in - it is better than letting him scream and cry. Avoid giving him Cola drinks. TV watching could also be quite harmful for him, as the ordinary serials and the ads have so much violence in them. His school should also help him, by keeping him out of range of doing harm to others. None of these suggestions would work as well as the advantages of good medical, or professional psychological advice. Keep a close watch and ensure that the people who help in the child's care when he is out of school, are all helpful and warm and not giving him a rough treatment. If there is a new baby in the house, he may just be asking that he also receive parental attention.

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