How should I handle my son?
Q: My son aged 10.5 years is studying in the 5th standard. He is our only child. Both of us are working and nobody is there at home to take care of him. He watches TV regularly. He is very fond of younger children and wants a younger brother. But due to age factor and other commitments, we decided not to go for a second child. My problem is that he is not very good at his studies. He studies well but forgets at a faster rate and also has a poor concentration. He doesn't like being compared to other kids. If I raise my voice, he becomes dull and shivers. If he feels that the subject is tough, he develops a headache. I am suffering from migraine. How do I make him understand the seriousness of his studies? Sometimes he scores good marks and sometimes he scores less. The main problem is that he thinks he is very poor in studies. I try to motivate him by praises and encouragement. He is good in painting, games etc. I request your help in how to judge my son. In what ways can I give him positive motivation? Is it my fault that I leave him and go to work?
A:I think you are a little confused about your own role as a mother. First of all, stop expecting to be the perfect mother. Plan instead to give your child unqualified affection, a firm and reasonable set of rules and plenty of opportunities to play with other children and with toys and play equipment suitable for his age. If you say you have migraine, he may just be saying so too. Cut down his TV time and get him wholesome books to read. Give him time to paint and do things in, which he is good. That is the best way of developing self confidence. Get the help of his teachers and of good friends of yours to see how you can deal with him. There is no need to judge him, anyway.