Am I pressurising my child too much for studies?
Q: My daughter is six years old and is very good in studies and drawing but the problem is she sometimes behaves very erratically and never sits static for a second. She becomes stubborn sometimes and does not listen to me particularly. Everyone praises her so I feel that may be I am wrong for giving her lectures to study. But I feel that nowadays if we don't pressurise children to study they will not be able to cope up. Please suggest what I should do to sweeten my relation with my daughter?
A:A bright six-year-old, who is good at studies and drawing does not need lectures on the importance of studying. I think you are taking a most unsuitable attitude to your childs present and future. It is not true that they have to realise the importance of studies. Children learn spontaneously and a good parent has to be alert and energetic to keep up with providing the child, materials for play and for learning concepts and for finding out about the world around. This is usually initiated by the child. We start too early, putting them into square frames, from which they cannot escape. Parenting the child can be a lot of fun when done properly, but not when feeling weighed down by a heavy sense of duty! Be more playful in organising activities for the child. If others praise the child, you are not going to bring a sense of balance by shouting at the child and forcing her to conform to some rule you have made. Young children like to move around a lot and we should set up their work and play space in such a way that they can. You can get your child to like you only when you show that you love her and are kind and understanding of her needs. Let her decide on minor issues at least, to get some sense of autonomy. Tell her that you want her to be happy. When your perspective changes for the better, she is bound to express her affection for you and grow up into a nice child.