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How to deal with absence of sex due to wife's illness?

Q: I am 40 years old, married for 10 years and have one son. My wife is 36 yrs. amd our son 6 yrs old. My wife has arthritis for the past 8 yrs. and it has become severe over the past 4 yrs. She has a problem in the knee and has a lot of pain which requires at least 5 tablets a day. Due to her physical condition we do not have sex for the last 5 yrs. I sympathise with my wife and am considerate to her. Because of her illness she cant even talk lovingly to me, even when I try to talk. This is causing loneliness and I am feeling very frustrated because of lack of sex. I take alcohol for the past two years to get myself involved and now I have high blood pressure. Is this due to my frustration regarding love and sex in my life? What should I do to come out of this?

A:We emphathise with you and appreciate your problem. Still, indulging in alcohol to escape from this reality is no solution. We suggest that both of you seek the help of a good psychiatrist who would counsel you and take you through various strategies that can help you in coping with the present crisis. There are many couples who are in a similar quandry, yet they do find out alternativs that actually work. Your stress may be responsible for your high B.P. Please seek professional help at the earliest.


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