Am I doing right to my boyfriend?
Q: My boyfriend and I have sex relatively often. Prior to him I had not had sex for eleven years and was no longer sexually aroused. He made it so different his mere touch turns me on. I now enjoy sex more than imaginable. My concerns are: 1. Whenever I am about to experience an orgasm, I fight it so desperately. Though I have had orgasm during lovemaking with my boyfriend, I have fought it most of the time. Somehow I am afraid that by experiencing an orgasm I would totally surrender myself to him and I might become his prisoner. I love him more than life itself, and want to surrender to him, I am so completely overwhelmed with fear that I talk myself and force him out of me whenever I feel about to explode. He feels guilty about not pleasing me, and sometimes I wonder if I might have a condition. 2. He had said to me on countless occasions that I make him experience pleasure, a sensation that he never has experienced before. He says that he has never enjoyed sex as much as he has enjoyed it with me, but I am concerned that he might be saying that just to please me but not really meaning it. He often wants to make love and always has an orgasm during sexual intercourse. Should I be concerned that he may just be using me to ejaculate but he may not really be enjoying sex with me? I am overweight and very conscious of my size. He said it does not matter to him and he complements me often, but could he be pretending? I have had two miscarriages over the past year, the last being most painful and sad since I was 29 week pregnant when it happened. I somehow blame him as the doctor said I should not be stressed and my pressure went very high and something happened the night before the miscarriage which depressed me. I am now nearly two month pregnant and experience much pain and have bled once soon after intercourse.
A:Issues like to have sex or not, when to have it and with whom to have it are all individual decisions and every one is free to take them. However, if you are having sex with your boyfriend and that too quite frequently, haven't you already surrendered yourself to him? In that case, why not enjoy it to the fullest and don't withhold yourself. It is absolutely essential that both of you take suitable precautions to prevent pregnancy. It is medically inadvisable to go for termination of pregnancy repeatedly and so frequently. For your other problems like bleeding after intercourse, please seek consultation with a gynaecologist.