Why is my son so attached to me?
Advisor on Child Development & Education,
Chennai
Q: My son in 2 years and 2 months old. The problem is that he is attached to me a lot. This is to the extent that he doesn't even like his mother in my presence. My wife has always been very loving. She tries hard to avoid scolding him. Ever since he was born, he has shown his inclination towards me. While I'm at work, he is quite OK with his mom, but the moment I get back home, he clings to me. He needs me for everything. At times, he even tells his mom to go out and leave the two of us alone. After being born, he and my wife went to India after 4 months and stayed there for 2 to 3 months. During that phase, he was close to his mom. He is a healthy child with good eating habits. He started talking by the age of 2. Please suggest.
A:I do not see that there is much of a problem. You say that your 2 year old is healthy, bright and talks well. All of these, make a great blessing. If he is very fond of you, what is the harm? Since he is away from you in India for half the year, he knows that your presence is intermittent and he values it a lot. And you say that he was close to you from the beginning. That should be seen as a strength, not as a weakness. Parents should not develop a competitive feeling regarding their children. The child should never be asked whom he likes more, father ormother . By that question we are forcing them to make a difficult and almost impossible choice and encouraging them to be manipulative. Enjoy your parenting. It is only natural for a child to want to be close to the father as soon as he is back from work. Treat the child as a 2 year old and dont expect maturity at this age.