How do deal with a child who is being defiant and adamant?

Q: My daughter is seven and a half years old, studying in class 2. She changed school in March-2003. She is brilliant and doing very well. However, her behaviour is becoming adamant and defiant in school. She refuses to write sometimes and starts roaming about in the whole class, throws other children's books or puts pencil marks on their books. She also refuses to share her seat in the bus with anyone other than her friend. We have tried counseling her but it is effective only for a day or two. At home she is a little fussy but manageable. We are both doctors. I (mother) am not working for the last 9 years except for 9 months, two years back. I have another daughter, one and half years old.

A:Your daughter's problem behaviour seems to have started with the change of school. It is therefore extremely necessary to explore the reasons for her distraction and non-cooperative behaviour, and deal with it accordingly. Your attempts at counseling her seem to be simple explaining attempts. Try to listen to her. Talk to her teachers and friends. Perhaps the change of school was due to unavoidable reasons, but there is definitely a negative impact on your child which needs to be dealt with more objectively by you or by a school counselor.